Tag: Advice

How I Deal with Feeling Stuck in Life

Have you ever had that feeling when the Devil’s Snare is holding you tightly and you’re just… stuck? Except you’re not really physically stuck. More like mentally and emotionally stuck. In life.

Image result for devils snare gif

I mean. We’ve all been 11-year-old Ron at some point, amirite? (Source)

Feeling stuck in life sucks. I end up panicking. Always. And as much as a level-headed Hermione in my mind tells me to just relax, Kate, just relax, my first instinct is to be Ron: become sarcastic while panicking.

I mean, just off the top of my head, this ‘I’m stuck’ feeling:

  • Makes you feel like you’re not doing anything
  • And because you’re not doing anything, you feel useless
  • And this makes you feel worthless
  • Which lowers your self-esteem
  • And you end up becoming a mashed/couch potato binge-watching awful reality shows on cable.

I’ve been a mashed/couch potato binge-watcher plenty of times and I honestly don’t want anyone to end up in the same position as I have, so I’m sharing to you what I do when I feel stuck in life. Hope this helps! 🙂

Purge / De-clutter

Has the physical chaos around you added to all that tangled mess already inside your head and it’s messing you up?

Friend, you’re not alone.

I’m not a very organized person. I have piles of scratch papers and empty watercolor tubes and dried up pens all over my room that I don’t throw out until it’s been like months. So when my mind becomes a hot mess and gets too overwhelming, the mess all around me is like a fuel to the already burning fire.

This is usually the time when I grab a broom and a rag and have an impromptu cleaning spree.

I’m telling you: there is something absolutely therapeutic about de-cluttering your space and purging the mess.

And I don’t call it a purge for show. If there’s an article of clothing I haven’t worn for like a year, I throw it out or donate it. If my desk or shelves are filled with papers from months ago, I throw them out. My sister had this paper bag filled with newspapers that she supposedly was going to add to her portfolio (she’s a journalist) but it’s been gathering dusts since last year. So when my brother needed paper for their classroom’s recycled Christmas decor, I gave the paper bag to him.

Look through every nook and cranny of your work space and your bedroom. If you’re a semi-organized fellow like moi, you’re bound to find a mess or four. So here are some quick de-cluttering you can start doing now:

  • Dust off those spider webs in the corner.
  • Organize your closet. (I mean, do you really really need that knitted hat with pompoms you’ve had since third grade? Come on, Janice.)
  • Unsubscribe to newsletters that you don’t read anymore.
  • Change your bed sheets and pillow cases. (I mean. That feeling of flopping onto a clean bed? 11/10 would do it every-freakin-day)
  • Organize your bookshelves. In rainbow colors or by authors, whatever suits your fancy.
  • Throw away those old earphones that don’t work anymore.
  • Deal with The Chair™. (You know? That chair in your room where a pile of your dirty laundry sits? Tell me I’m not the only one with that chair.)

Be ruthless in your purging. When I purge I only follow one rule: if it doesn’t do any good to you anymore, it doesn’t need to occupy much space in your life. Throw them out. Let them go. Give them to other people who will make use of them. The act of cleaning and de-cluttering is a big help. And when you’re done, you’ve got so much more room to do more things. #Win.

Move / Take Action

There are so many things I didn’t get to do because I thought I wasn’t ready. And, listen, this is a very unhealthy thought to have, okay? Don’t be like me, kids.

Sometimes we get stuck because we have this mindset that we’re not good enough for anything. That we aren’t ready. That our skills isn’t enough to do what we want to do. It’s like you’re stuck in a quicksand made of all the negative self-talk you’ve created.

But you know what? No one’s ever ready for anything.

At this point, I’ve probably watched enough TED Talk videos and listened to enough motivational podcasts to know people rarely are completely ready when they start doing what they’ve wanted to do.

And you know what? There’s absolutely nothing wrong with that 🙂

In fact, if you’re not ready but you jumped in and started anyway, GO YOU! That’s brave and that in itself is something to be proud of—because you faced your fear and said, “I’m doing this anyway.”

Avoid Comparisonitis

Boy oh boy. This is probably a common problem among people in the Internet. Because, you know, social media.

We can all agree social media feeds on the little green monster living inside us, right? Seeing the fabulous achievements and gorgeous lifestyle your Facebook friends have, the glamorous travel-filled life of the people you follow on Instagram… All these make comparisonitis such an easy sickness to get. And comparisonitis can make you feel like you’re not good enough to do something. Which can end up with you feeling stuck.

When that happens, I want you to remember this:

Social media is a highlights reel.

People usually only post the good things that happen in their lives. The things “worth sharing.” (Except Twitter. Twitter is the John Bender of social media.)

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This guy, I swear. (Source)

I remind myself this all the time. I forgot where I found it—I tried looking for it but my History tab and my memory are both jumbled mess—but I read somewhere that we all compare our real life to another person’s highlights reel online. And that doesn’t seem fair to yourself, isn’t it?

What the post said was so accurate for me that I whipped out a blank sheet of paper and wrote a line from the blog post that really stuck to me. I have it on my desk beside my computer where I can see it everyday.

 

I think I paraphrased this to make it shorter and fit the paper. So if you know where this is, let me know in the comments so I can fully credit them! 🙂

Somehow, reading this quote every morning or when I’m working on my desk gives me comfort. Knowing and constantly reminding myself that other people go through bad times too and that they also rarely share all this to the world makes me more empathetic, I guess. 🙂

How do you deal with feeling like you’re stuck in life? Share your wisdom in the comments below!

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PS: If you like this post, check out why it’s okay not to have everything figured out and how to conquer creative block.


Friendly reminder that my blog birthday giveaway is still going on! You can win an art commission or a custom set of blog graphic elements including a blog header 😀

Interested? Click on the image below for more info.

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What To Do When You’re Having Blog Burn Out

You know, I personally think that starting a blog isn’t so hard.

I mean, sure, you get jitters and you’ve been thinking about having one and you’re probably going to overthink everything. And I mean every. Single. Thing. But when you get past all the necessary blanks to fill, get that first post live and start interacting with fellow bloggers, you realize, “Hey, that wasn’t so bad!”

It’s kinda like learning how to swim. You’d think you’ll surely drown but the moment you cross one point to another without a rubber tube, you realize it’s so freaking easy.

The difficult part in blogging, at least in my case, is the maintaining and growing.

Maintaining a blog means writing, taking pictures, editing, and virtually mingling with other blogging peeps. And when you’re busy as heck with other stuff in your life (e.g., school, work) the maintaining part could get really tedious.

It’ll be like crossing the English Channel when you are only a novice swimmer.

End of story? Blog burn out.

What to do when you have a blog burn out

I’ve had more than a couple of blogging burnouts in nearly two years, most of which I’ve thought of quitting altogether. Just recently, I’ve had two a few months past. But I’m getting the hang of this and I’ve learned a thing or two.

So today I want to share what I do when I’m having a blog burn out.

1 | Identifying the Problem

Burn outs don’t happen all of a sudden. You think they do but they don’t. It’s like the flu. So you want to recall what you’ve done recently that could have caused it. Were you working too much? Were you drowning in self-doubt?

I obsess myself with a lot of things blogging-wise (because, you know, overthinker) but particularly in my blogging schedule. I started posting spontaneously then I decided posting more “regularly”, which means almost every-freaking-day. It was at that point when I felt squeezed out of ideas to write about and I just can’t take it anymore. (Okay I feel like that’s a lyrics to something. But whaaat?) Now I know my limits and try to be mindful about it.

Knowing what the problem is can be helpful, not only to remedy yourself from the burn out but also to avoid it in the future. Because no one wants to feel bad by the same thing twice, amiright?

2 | Refueling My Motivation

I’m the kind of person who has unlimited source of inspiration but that gets clogged up inside me because I’m lazy and my motivation is limited. I usually end up just daydreaming about awesome things but I’ll be like, “Ehh, I’ll do it later.”

I know me. Which is why I find inspiration whenever I’m having a burn out. This could be going to Pinterest or visit my #goals blogs (aka: bloggers I want to be like in the future) and just scroll through the many awesome things I expose myself to.

I’d get super pumped up and inspired that I’ll start writing.

3 | Creating an Idea Dump

Blog burn out usually means having your creative juices frozen or worse dried up. So to me, it’s extremely important to take the  time to simply sit down, have a notebook and pen on the table and just stare at them.

No kidding, I really just stare.

It usually gets me bored and I let my thoughts roam free. Going from this imaginary world that I hope I could make into a novel to random musings like, “Will little chicks ever learn to shut up?” (I was sitting in our backyard) And sometime later an idea will pop up.

Boredom does that, you know. Help you out creatively. And science has proven it!

Now this is just my ideal method for coming up with topics to write about. And it works great for me. If you want more, the amazing Allison from Wonderlass (one of my #goals blogs) has shared more ways to avoid running out of awesome content ideas.

4 | When All Else Fails, Take a Break

Sometimes a blog burn out just gets too overwhelming that nothing works anymore. So take a break!

No one will arrest you for taking a break from blogging. In fact, because most of the blogosphere denizens are super nice, you’ll be missed but they’ll understand.

And anyway, it’ll be good to you–mentally, emotionally and creatively. You’ll be free from that claustrophobic feeling that you get from the burn out and when you go back, you’ll be refreshed and so full of ideas!

I would know, I took a break last month. Went to Patrick’s rock. 😄

Burn outs are a pain in the backside but it’s not the end of the world! There are always gonna be ways to remedy them and avoid them in the future. Speaking of avoiding burnouts, I found this really awesome post from Melissa Hebbe where she shares some tips on avoiding blog burn out. I really like the bit about allowing yourself to fail.

Have you ever had a blog burn out? Do you do something about it that I haven’t mentioned? Share it in the comments below or tweet me!

Happy blogging, awesome peeps! 💃