Scrolling through Reader, I came across an intriguing blog post from a blogger I looked up to my whole blogging life. It was about how the blogosphere had drastically changed from what it was 5, 10 years ago.
Their post felt to me like a gentle tug towards light. Light I’ve occasionally felt and noticed, here and there, these past two years. And as if in some sort of trance, I clicked on the comment box at the end of the page and started typing. After putting in the final period, I was astounded by the wall of texts that laid before me. It had been an awfully long time since I wrote an essay comments. Reading through it was an even bigger surprise.
I thought it was good writing. I say that with zero bragging intentions. The comment I wrote on that post was truly a paragraph perfectly woven to communicate my thoughts and feelings about blogging. So I thought I’d share it here too:
(Note: I’ve added a few lines and tweaked it a bit but the overall gist is the same.)
I used to be in the personal development niche until I submerged in a constant state of burnout 2018 onwards. It took me about a year to realize that the sheer and simple joy of Just Writing Whatever had gradually chipped away until all I could think about when I open my blog are the numbers.
I had to physically step away from blogging. I needed space.
It’s been about a year now since I decided to just post whatever whenever. There are still times when a little voice in my head nags at me when I open WordPress and see those small stats bar, or seeing my blogger friends continue to thrive with their sponsored posts.
Reading your post was a gentle reminder of why I decided what I decided to do in the first place. That I want to reclaim blogging and writing from the heart. That I want to experience that joy of simply typing out my feelings and publishing it and not really thinking about the likes or the views or what any other people think.
For now, in both my art and my writing, the only person I want to satisfy is myself.
It sounds a bit selfish but honestly? It’s a far better way to live my creative life. Far better than thinking of the entire world and seriously wondering whether or not they like what I created. That’s fucking impossible.
There’s nothing wrong with being a little self-indulgent in this case.